To Love Is To Bury
by Mistress Of The Macabre
Summary: Satan didn't know what 'love' was, or what it meant to 'live'- all he knew was this human could show him. She made him curiously weak, and made him realise that even demons have a human side. Satan/Yuri drabbles. M for dark themes and sexual references.


**A/N: Hey everyone! This is my first attempt at a Blue Exorcist fic, so go easy on me, please! xD This is based off the anime Satan/Yuri pairing, so yeah…I've only seen the anime, but I hope everyone likes it! :D **

_**To Love is To Bury**_

_**First Sight**_

The group of Exorcists trudged through the snow, draping their coats closer to their freezing bodies. There were five of them, four men and one woman, their breath blowing out as white vapour. They muttered to each other, words that Satan could not understand.

They were speaking another language.

It was fascinating, the demon thought, cocking his head to the side as he considered the group of humans making their way towards him. They could not see him; he could not possess a living body in Assiah for more than a few minutes at a time, lest the body collapse in on itself. No; he merely existed on this plain as an invisible entity of sorts- unable to do anything but merely observe this strange world around him.

What could possibly be so interesting as to have captured their attention? Satan wondered, as the Exorcists continued to mutter over a piece of paper.

"…case of spontaneous combustion," the woman said, and he didn't understand what that meant, either. It was amazing how little the demon lord actually knew outside of Gehenna; but that was the purpose of this journey, was it not? To learn more about this alternate universe?

He sighed. These people were interesting…he reached out to touch them, to perhaps get a feel for what these humans were, how they functioned, what their purpose was in Assiah.

His phantasmic fingers lightly brushed the coat of one of the men. Instantly, the men's coat was alight with blue flames. Startled, Satan withdrew his hand, but the flames had caught- demonic fire was unlike any other in that it spread, and spread fast- soon the man was consumed by blue flames, screaming in agony. He could hear his body fat bubbling and spitting, and the demon found that he felt nothing- should he have? Felt something, that is?

Out of sheer curiosity, he touched another one of the humans, and another, and another, and finally the woman, and he watched them all be set ablaze by his trademark blue flames, and he watched them scream in agony, skin and sinew melting from their bones, mouths agape with horror.

Within a few moments, they had ceased to exist.

Except for the woman. She lay curled on the ground, staring wildly around her. Her turquoise eyes slid over Satan, who had watched the proceedings with little more than a mild amusement, and kept scanning the area. Her hair was frazzled, though not nearly as bad as it should have been- by all means, she should have had no hair at all, and her clothes nothing but ashes, but instead they were rumpled. She saw that her companions were dead, and a strange liquid began oozing from her eyes.

Satan frowned. What was this? It was quite unlike anything he had ever seen before. He took a step forward, intrigued as to what the liquid was, and why this woman hadn't been harmed by his inferno.

Just then, she looked up, and she gasped a little. He halted, and considered her warily. Then she smiled, and he knew that she could _see _him.

She looked like she was about to say something, but he gave her no chance. He fled from Assiah instantly.

_**Intrigued**_

He eventually returned to Assiah, his curiosity getting the better of him. Why had that woman not been affected by his flames? Why should she, a weak vessel of blood and bones, not burn instantly at his touch? She was easily dispensable, not a hint of demon blood in her- so _why? _

He growled, a sound that came deep from the depths of his belly. His current host was a magnificent, white-furred creature- a _wolf, _he understood it was called- and was able to sustain his presence surprisingly better than a human host. It frustrated him that a _human _had been able to survive his touch.

Indeed, he had been to Assiah many times in his long, long lifetime, but never had he found a human such as her. Some queer part of him longed to see her again, if not just to figure out what she _was. _

The wolf pawed the ground and whined slightly. The ears went back. Someone was coming.

It was _her. _The human who had a resistance to his blue flames. She looked exactly the same as he remembered, but she was alone this time, and she didn't look afraid like most people did when they saw his blue flames.

Satan remained where he was, and glared as she approached. He was simultaneously intrigued by this woman, and yet repulsed by her. No _normal _human could ever live after being doused with his power. What the hell _was _she?!

She stopped perhaps three feet from him, and held her hands out in a gesture of surrender. Her face- a very pretty face, he noted sourly- was kind, not frightened at all.

He could not speak to her directly; his wolf host could not manage it, but he could still speak to her through his thoughts. _Do you know what I am? _He asked her. _Do you know __**who **__I am? _

She returned his gaze evenly. "Yes," she said simply. The wolf pawed the ground angrily, another snarl erupting from its' mouth.

_Get out of my sight, or I'll destroy you like I did the others! _Satan roared, baring his fangs at the frustratingly calm woman.

She didn't even blink. "If that's what you want, then go ahead."

_As you wish!_ He let out a cry of rage, and leapt forward, his teeth fastening themselves around her calf. Now she _did _grimace with pain, as those fangs slid into her soft flesh, spilling a queer red liquid into Satan's hot mouth. But she didn't try to kill him, nor did she pull away. They were locked into a battle of wills, the woman staring down at the great white wolf laced with blue fire, the wolf itself glaring back with beady yellow eyes as he continued to bite her leg.

Satan's very essence was blue fire, and yet this woman had a will of fire. It was some time before either of them spoke, and it was the woman who spoke first.

"When I saw your flames, I could hear your voice," she said, grimacing as the wolf let go of her leg. Satan stepped back. He almost seemed to be considering her. "You didn't mean to kill those people, did you?"

_No, _he admitted, _I did not. Whenever I touch something in Assiah, it bursts into flame and turns to ash. _He did not add that it had not been his intention to kill anybody; he had been merely curious, and of course he had wanted to touch things, see what they felt like, and how they worked. It was one thing to _see, _but something else entirely to _feel. _Yet he had not been able to feel anything. True to his word, anything Satan touched was instantly destroyed. It was the same reason he could not possess a human body; he only destroyed the things that intrigued him.

He would never admit it, but it was a lonely and disappointing existence. As Samael had once remarked, the loneliness was getting to his eyes- it was becoming a part of who he _was._

"It must be lonely," she said now, and he flattened his ears in surprise- had she been able to read his mind?- "I mean, wanting to reach out and touch something, to see everything you cherish burn up in your hands." To his horror, that vile liquid began to ooze from the corners of her eyes, and she gave him a sad smile. "You must be so sad…"

Satan's shock turned into fury. _Be silent, human! _He roared, gnashing his teeth at the woman, who still did not turn away. He snarled at her viciously, hoping for her to run from him, because she scared him with the depths of her insight. In Gehenna, demons knew him as the strongest, the mightiest- the very idea that he was lonely, sad, _weak, _angered him to no end. He did not want this woman's pity. He was the strongest demon in all of Gehenna! He was above pity!

She smiled as if she knew exactly how he was feeling. It was not a derogatory smile, and that black, sparking coil of anger in Satan's gut flickered and died at the sight. A smile like that had never been directed at him. He was accustomed to being feared; this kind smile felt beyond bizarre to him. "You _are _sad, and if you want, I have an idea." She held her hands out to him.

He considered her. He still did not yet know what she was, and yet…she was unique, unlike any other human he had seen before. He wanted to know who and what she was, and what this 'idea' was. A strange new sensation began to course through him. It rose up through his body, warm and…happy. He didn't know what it was, but it was a welcome change from the constant cold, hard, icy loneliness he was used to.

Was it…

…Was it _hope? _

The gargantuan wolf crept forward, eyes blazing, and sniffed the woman's hand delicately.

**The Ocean.**

The woman's name was Yuri Egin.

He had learnt this when she allowed him into her body. It was a queer feeling- her body did not disintegrate with her presence, and he was able to view Assiah through her eyes. Possessing humans was always a strange experience. He saw the world through her eyes, but could not control her movements like he normally would- instead, their minds were connected. Her thoughts were his thoughts, and vice-versa.

They were _bonded. _

He felt at ease in her body, and if his presence gave any discomfort, Yuri didn't show it. Instead, she showed him Assiah.

At present, they were standing on a pier, looking out to a vast blue liquid that sparkled in the sunlight. The sun was warm- he could feel it on Yuri's skin. Satan would have been quite content to bask in the sun, and soak it up, because there was no such thing in Gehenna- it was a vast, dark land predominated by a bloody moon. Now he could appreciate why so many of his underlings ventured out here- this was beautiful.

_What is that? _He asked Yuri, meaning the sparkling blue liquid. Yuri laughed.

"That's the ocean, silly! It's nice and cold, and lots of strange creatures live there!"

_Strange creatures? _He wondered. _Like water nymphs? Or demons? _

She shook her head. "No, no, you've got it all mixed up, Satan! There aren't any water nymphs here! Or demons," she added hastily, and Satan shrugged. How was he supposed to know? She rolled her eyes. Whenever he didn't know something, Satan had a tendency to shrug. "D'you…d'you wanna see what's down there?" she asked excitedly.

_I would like that very much,_ he answered. Yuri grinned.

"Okay, well here goes!" and she flung herself into the blue liquid, the 'ocean'. She was right; the water was cold- it was like a slap in the face after standing in the hot sun, and the demon took a moment to steel himself. He'd never been in such deep water before, and through Yuri's eyes, he stared down into the abyss. It was very blue here, and strange green plants bloomed out of sand, swaying with the currents. Yuri was a strong swimmer, and she kicked out, propelling them deeper into the water.

Small, dark creatures darted out from in front of them. Satan gaped, as they rocketed away with a flick of their tails. Yuri was right, he decided, these things were definitely not water nymphs. They were unlike anything he had ever seen before, but he wasn't repulsed by them. In fact, darting through the water, scales glittering beautifully when caught in the beams of sunlight, they were…wonderful.

Floating there in the water, he felt he could stare at this beauty for eternity. However, when Yuri's chest began to burn, he understood that it was time to return to the surface, and he went without complaint. They broke the surface, Yuri coughing slightly, a huge grin plastered on her face. She'd known what the ocean was ever since she was little, but feeling Satan's glee, she felt like she was rediscovering Assiah's secrets herself.

_What were those? _He asked. _They're graceful. And beautiful. _He spoke that last word like he'd never said it before.

Yuri giggled, tossing her damp hair back behind her shoulder. "Those were fish! There are lots of them, and they all live here, in the ocean!"

_I like them, _he admitted. _There is no creature close to them in Gehenna. _

She grinned. "Want to go see them again?"

_Need you ask? _Was his reply.

They dove down again.

**Life.**

They were walking through what Yuri called a 'field' when they came across the small creature. It was tiny, brown, and it lay motionless on the ground. "Oh, no!" Yuri exclaimed, and bent to pick it up; it was so small that it fit snugly in her cupped hands. She stroked its tiny head gently. Satan, through Yuri, felt the softness of its' feathers, and had to refrain from asking Yuri to pat it again. "The poor thing," she whispered, all of her earlier energy gone. Satan was beginning to understand that this was what humans did when they were sad. Next would come the leaking of the eyes.

_What is wrong with it? _He asked doubtfully, _Is it sleeping? _

"No, it's dead."

_What is 'dead'? _Satan had never heard the term before.

"Dead is when something's life ends," Yuri said, obliging Satan and stroking the bird once more. She then sat it down, and started digging a small hole with her fingers. Luckily, the soil was soft and yielded to their fingers easily. She was making a hole for the bird.

_What is 'life'? _

"Life is something every bird, plant and human has," she answered, placing the bird into the hole and starting to fill it back up again, "Everything that breathes has a consciousness, what we call life. Everything's different, wonderful, and very precious."

So living was different to existing? From what Yuri said, the two things were very different. It occurred to him that until recently, he had been only been _existing. _He was _living _now.

_Life…I would very much like to have that, _he mused, as Yuri finished her makeshift grave, smoothing the soil with her hands.

Yuri gave him a sad smile. "Life is not something that can be bargained for, or bought," she told him, and he scowled inwardly. As a demon lord, he could not truly die, and would live forever. He would never know what it was to live, to breathe, or to bleed- he was immortal. Yuri sensed his pain, and smiled, this time more brightly. "Hey, I have an idea."

_What is it? _

"You might not be able to buy life, but maybe we can nurture one, create life ourselves."

_We can do that? _His shock was understandable. Yuri suppressed a laugh. Satan had learned much during his time in her body, but they hadn't gone over creating life. Lovemaking.

"Yes, we can," Yuri grinned at his delight. "Would you like to?"

…_Yes, I think I would like that very much. _

**Creating Life**

_It was a dream, but at the same time, it wasn't. It was the most realistic dream Yuri had ever had; she could feel the snow crunching under her bare feet, could hear the trees creaking overhead in the wind. There was a slight breeze that tugged at her nightdress feebly, and as she walked onward, she felt a growing sense of trepidation and excitement make itself known in her gut. _

_This new place was unfamiliar to her, but she didn't care. _

_She and Satan were going to create Life. _

_As she walked, the moon rode overheard, as bright as day. It slowly drifted across the sky, and when she reached the small clearing, it was gone from her sight. _

_Only the dream-stars were watching her now. _

_He was waiting for her, tall and magnificent. She wasn't sure what she expected Satan to look like- a tall, dark creature with red eyes and fangs, perhaps, but she couldn't have been more wrong. The only aspect of him that she had gotten right was his height; he towered over her. He was dressed simply in black, and he didn't bother to hide his demonic traits for her. His tail swept the ground, perhaps nervously, and his ears were clearly pointed. His brow was furrowed in a frown._

_When he heard her approaching, his face lit up like a Christmas tree, and she saw that he was handsome. He had short, beautiful white-blonde hair (it reminded her of the wolf's fur, she thought), and his eyes were a bright, beautiful yellow. _

"_Yuri," he said, and there was a lot of weight in that one word, and it only made her more nervous and excited. _

"_Satan," she replied. Her heartbeat was loud in her ears. _

_He held a hand out to her. "Come." _

_He took her in his arms, and she shivered with anticipation. "Trust me," he whispered, in a calm, liquid voice that she had learnt could not lie. Somewhat awkwardly, he pressed his lips to her neck. "Trust me, Yuri." _

"_I trust you," she stammered. And she did. She really did. _

_His lips moved against her neck with finesse. It was hard to believe that he had only learned of this…stuff…a few hours ago. He clutched her tight to him. "Then let go, Yuri. Let's create life. Let go." _

_So she did. And no matter what Shiro and the others would say, it was nothing like surrender. _

_She let go, and together, they made Life._

**The Blue Night**

"Witch! Murderer! Whore of Satan!" They slung insult after insult at her, and she couldn't do anything. Not while she was tied up, that was.

Yuri was terrified. She'd known that someone would eventually find out that she had allowed herself to be possessed by Satan, and more than likely try to kill her, but that still didn't stop the tears of fright run down her cheeks, as she stood atop piles upon piles of kindling. She was tied to a cross; she was going to be burnt alive.

She wept freely, as the exorcists approached with the flaming torches; the kindling had been doused in petrol a few moments before, and would go up instantly, engulfing her and her sons, the Life she had made with Satan. "No! Please!" she screamed at them, twisting in her restraints, "You don't have to do this!"

"Whore!" Someone cried. "Slut!"

Her belly bulged from her dress. Satan had looked inside her and told her that she was having twins- two boys, if he was right. _This can't be happening, _she thought frantically, still struggling, _they can't kill my sons, they can't do this! _

The first of the torches was flung onto the kindling, and then Yuri knew real pain. Suddenly she was on fire; she screamed and struggled, trying her best to protect her sons, but she knew that it was no use.

_After everything that's happened, this is how it's going to end? _

"NO!" a new voice bellowed, and something flashed- a knife. Yuri flinched, expecting it to cut her, but it didn't. It sliced through the ropes binding her, and she fell forward, coughing. "Yuri!"

She looked, and saw that her rescuer had been a priest. _What the…? _No, it wasn't a priest. It was Satan. He had possessed someone, and, before her eyes, the body began to collapse. Blood ran from his mouth like a red river. He helped her up clumsily, more blood gushing from his orifices. "Yuri, run," he coughed wetly, "_run!" _

So she ran. She heard a wet _splat _behind her, and suddenly the exorcists in front of her were on fire. She sidestepped them, and continued running, as her lover destroyed those who tried to kill their children.

The blue fire blazed.

**To Love is To Bury**

Satan's face was drawn, his expression carefully neutral. Following what had later become known as 'the Blue Night', he had retreated back to Gehenna, sure that his lover and his children were safe. He was at present sitting at his desk, leaning on his forearms, staring blankly at Samael, also known as Mephisto Pheles.

"Are you sure she's…dead?" he asked Mephisto quietly. The purple-haired demon nodded. Satan sighed. Time moved differently in Gehenna than Assiah. He could not be sure how many years had passed; he had been certain that he had killed those exorcists just yesterday.

"I'm afraid so, father,"" Mephisto said, his exuberant personality gone for now, "but her sons live."

"Hmm?" Satan looked up from his hands, his face still blank, but his eyes suddenly ablaze with curiosity.

Mephisto smiled. "Yes, they live. They have been alive for fifteen years, father."

"Fifteen years, eh…" Satan sighed. "They're living with that exorcist, aren't they?"

"Yes."

"I'm going to keep an eye on them, Samael," Satan said, closing his eyes and leaning back in his chair as if he was tired, "we will see if we cannot make Yuri's dream come true."

"If you say so," Mephisto said doubtfully.

Satan grinned inwardly. Though he put up a good front, he was still very much _living. _He had loved Yuri. Love had, to a point, made him bury his apathy, his demonic nature. Yuri was gone, but their sons- Rin and Yukio- were very much alive.

Perhaps, through those two, they would achieve peace after all.

_To love is to bury, _he thought, and he began to smile.

**A/N: I had no idea what Satan would look like, so I based his human appearance from the wolf in the anime. Anyway…I hope you guys like it, and reviews would be greatly appreciated! :D **


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